Form a Pseudo-Friendship with these People at Work

You need to be friends with the Gatekeeper, Well-Connected Social Butterfly, Grapevine Monitor, and Cool-Headed Veteran. I'm none of these people, so no one at work should want to be my friend. I'm the Revolutionary, Jack-of-all-Trades Newbie, and I didn't see this mentioned in Careerbuilder's article on the four friends you need at work. There is some truth to this if you are one of those people who actually cares about your job and is trying to get ahead in that very workplace. But, not me, so much. I don't really consider myself friends with anyone in the true sense, but I'm kind of leery of individuals in my crazy, ridiculous workplace who are really interested in getting ahead through the established channels of groveling, manipulating, lying, and backstabbing. But, of all of these, I like the Cool-Headed Veteran the most. They are calm and know how to get through difficult times. I am not unlike them in terms of generally being calm, but we differ in that I am interested in the overthrow of the system. Check out the article, and see if it helps you. If anything, you can amuse yourself with guessing who comes closest to each description.